WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget..
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of
something you forgot?

ATTORNEY:
Now doctor , isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep , he
doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son , the 20-year-old , how old is he?
WITNESS: He's 20 ,
much like your IQ.

ATTORNEY:
Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August
8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid

ATTORNEY:
She had three children , right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor,
I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

ATTORNEY:
How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death..
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.

ATTORNEY:
Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium
height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was
in town I'm going with male.

ATTORNEY: Is
your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which
I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY:
Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them.. The live
ones put up too much of a fight.

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral , OK? What school
did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral..
ATTORNEY: Do
you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started
around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not , he was by the
time I finished.

ATTORNEY:
Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive
when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was
sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive,
nevertheless?